im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
When did angry sex become our thing?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
