TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
