A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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