p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize