Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
