he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
