I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
