i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
