How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
