i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just google imaged poop.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
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