sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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