Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
