dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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