in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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