Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
dude. I can hear the air.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
