found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
