We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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