I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
