how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
