haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
one might say we're banned from that church
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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