Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She even gives head with a lisp.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
