I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
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