If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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