Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
