...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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