I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
