well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize