I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
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