just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
