unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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