do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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