Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
