Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
