i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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