What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
