Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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