How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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