omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Randomize
