when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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