remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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