Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
