I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
