Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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