There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
