Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
