He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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