You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
