Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize