Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
