you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
